Luis Introduces Casey to His Protective Latina Mom and Aunt

My aunt is gonna love you.

Luis, I know. I'm so excited.

All right, let's go.

Tia Rosa, we're here.

Mi sobrino, llegate.

Mi sobrino favorito.

Dios mio, mi hijo.

Okay, lady, yes, I love it. Go off, Tia.

And who, who is she?

Um, Tia, this is Casey. Ella es mi novia, my girlfriend.

Hi.

Mm, linda, linda. Muy old, maybe. No se.

Uh, thank you.

Don't worry about her. She's just a little bit protective,

but it's nothing

compared to my mom.

Estan hablando de mi.

Mamá, I didn't know you were here.

Ay, mijo lindo. Dios mio y la Virgen y los tres

reyes magos. Why you didn't tell me you

were here? I kill you. I break your car.

Ay, I miss you so much.

Hey.

I pray for you every morning, every noon, every night. I love you. I miss you.

I love

you.

Well, hey, it's like a family reunion in here.

Who?

Mm, esa es la nueva novia de Luis, nique, la girlfriend.

Well, hi, Ms. Flores. I didn't realize you were gonna be here,

but I'm so excited

that I brought cookies, so...

Ah, so thoughtful to not make them yourself.

Come, sit. Sit, sit.

Hi.

So,

uh, Casey, what do you do for work?

Oh, well, currently, I am a graphic designer for my dad's

nonprofit.

Oh, good, because nobody likes profit.

Mamá.

Ay, por favor, no puedo creer que me trajiste a un

nepo-baby.

Que seguro compra toda su comida en Trader Joe's.

Pero Claudia, ¿que tu, que tu esperabas?

Si, ese es el pasatiempo de todas las niñas

que tienen un flat

butt.

Okay, uh, are, are you talking about me?

No, my love, I'm talking about another white girl with

flat butt.

Pero la verdad es que esta muy blanquita. ¿Verdad? Sale, ven aca, ven aqui.

No se, parece que trabaja en Starbucks.

Okay, well, um, I just,

I want you guys to like me, and I love Luis, and I feel like I've

been really good for him, like when he got diagnosed with

depression.

Oh, Casey, no, no, no, no, no.

What do you mean, mi sobrino got depression?

Mi hijo

does not have depression. He just like the dark.

Mamá.

Oh, no, no, no, no, no. He tried to get it when he was a kid.

He said, "Mommy, I'm depressed." Then I said,

"Don't do that.

Do something else."

Okay, well, depression doesn't actually work that way.

Oh oh.

I didn't know she was a doctor with that thing in her nose.

Oh, this? Uh, it's called a septum piercing.

Oh, I have a piercing too, 'cept I'm putting it in my ear where it

belongs.

Mamá.

No, no, no. Yo no me puedo imaginar que tu vas a estar

con ella y tener

white grandchildren.

Y todo el mundo va a tener que decir Tyler and Hailey

Gonzalez.

Mamá, estoy enamorado de ella. No me importa que ella

usa organic deodorant.

Y yo no tengo problema con que tenga cara de bisexual

barista.

Tu podrias haber traído a una buena niña latina trabajadora

como Jenna Ortega, Ana de Armas, Cardi B.

Pero no. Tu llegas a la casa de tu tia con

Greta Thunberg.

Mamá, por favor.

Luis, no le grites a tu mamá, que lo que ella quiere decirte es que a

ella no le

importa si tu te metes con ella como, como, como un booty

call.

O ella no tiene que ser tu novia oficial.

Ella puede ser como, como un side chick o, o un

sneaky link.

All right, uh, you guys, I know I'm not exactly what you

were expecting,

but can we just start over and have dinner?

I would hate for all this delicious food to go to waste.

Honestly, I'm not even hungry anymore.

No. Don't do this again. Ugh. How many times have I told you

you do not eat enough?

Ay. Welcome to my son. Ay,

Luis,

give me Tyler. Give me h-