Song lyrics exploring emotions and memories

A different scent in your hair than usual, leading a life where I'm being toyed with

Gently burying my loosening smile into my scarf

Since when did I become so patient like this?

Even though I was made fun of for being a crybaby since childhood

“Keep it a secret” What a cruel thing to say

My screams are fading away

The future that should have been ordinary is so far away

I know without having to ask anyone

I will never reach the source of the secret

Where should I end up?

Not knowing, I just hold hands and follow along

Burning my chest enough to drown out the anxiety of love

My yearning won't fade, it's the end

I didn't want to know such a thing

That moment was so fleeting

Even though it's so true

I wanted to secretly know myself

As if I know what's bad

If it were me, I couldn't have screamed

But everything was for the first time

I still wanted to believe

I know without having to ask anyone

He won't give me happiness

Even so, what he gave me...

It's not like there was nothing

Thanks to every day, that old lie...

I can't hear anything happy

I want to change