Time Traveler Confronts Hitler in Comedy

I'm a time traveler from the year 2025,

and I've come here to kill you, Hitler!

Oh, not again!

I'm never gonna have enough time to finish these paintings

with all of these time travelers trying to kill me!

Well, I'm going to succeed. But before you pull the trigger,

can I just ask why?

Why do all of you people want to kill me?

Isn't it obvious?

I'm a progressive, a liberal, a fighter for social justice,

and you are a fascist who implemented a reign of terror.

And while the effects of your policies devastated the world for decades,

soon we will be able to take back the White House,

and we will be able to use the government to force people to follow our great ideas!

You want to use government power to force your ideas on the populace?

Me too! That's fantastisch!

What? No, no!

You and I have nothing in common.

What I'm saying is there are people in our time with dangerous ideas,

and we need to silence them. Silencing those who disagree with you.

I do that too!

Au wunderbar! The Nazi movement will not die with me.

Don't give me that!

I'm enlightened, and you're as bad as,

well, as Hitler.

Listen, what I'm trying to say is we are very close to implementing a utopia,

as long as we can get rid of some certain undesirable people groups.

Yes, like the Jews! Yes, like the Jews!

Oh. So, in the future, you also do not like the Jews?

Well, no. But we don't believe in segregating all the races like you do.

I mean, except for, like, graduation ceremonies.

And dorms. And hiring practices. Oh, and admissions policies. That sort of thing.

I, too, am a fan of the segregation.

I'm sorry, I have to ask, is this a real firearm,

or is this some kind of toy for, uh, for kids?

It's a flare gun. I'm trying not to support America's toxic gun culture.

I'm a firm believer in gun control.

Gun control!

This was one of my ideas, too.

Ban them from the undesirables. Yes, look here.

Oh, oh, oh, and your, uh, your shirt. This is an organization, uh, founded by Margaret Sanger,

yes? Wait, you know about Margaret Sanger? Jawohl,

of course! Oh, she's such a lovely person.

No, no, no, no, no, no, no.

She's a fighter for reproductive rights, for women's empowerment, and-

And the eradication of undesirable populations by means of eugenics. Brilliant lady, very inspiring.

I must use some of her ideas in our socialized health care system.

Socialized health care?

That's not your thing, that's, that's our thing.

No, no, that's very much my thing.

Did you know that Nazi means

National Socialist German Workers' Party?

Nazi is just, uh, more catchy.

Nazi, Nazi, Nazi, Nazi, Nazi.

Just rolls off the tongue.

No, this can't be true.

This has to be some sort of mistake.

We are nothing alike.

You're Adolf Hitler, evil right-wing fascist dictator,

and I'm a feminist restorative justice advocate.

And a vegetarian. You're a vegetarian?

Me too! Okay,

I am so confused right now.

I came here with a clear goal in mind to kill

the most evil man to have ever lived.

Besides Ronald Reagan.

But now that I'm meeting you in person,

you're not at all what I thought you were.

And your painting is actually really good.

What do you call it? I call it Ein Reich ohne Juden.

Wow, I don't know what that means, but it sounds beautiful.

It does, doesn't it? It does.