Conspiracy Theories and Humor

Done. I win.

Cheryl, it's not a race.

That's what losers say.

What is that? The truth.

Every time a new baby is born,

the Federal Reserve issues a secret birth certificate printed by a company called

the American Bank.

That way, the government can

use people as currency to back the debt they have with the World Economic Forum,

which owns the central banks of every nation on Earth.

But the WEF is just a front for the Council on Foreign Relations,

which masterminded the 9 11 attacks as a pretext to invade Iraq,

take the oil, and install fast food chains to make people slow, fat,

and easily abductable by the shapeshifting reptilian aliens it works with.

Now, back in the 30s,

FDR made a deal with these reptilians to exchange people for technology.

That was the basis of the New Deal.

But ever since, they've been slowly replacing all the world leaders to create a

nuclear holocaust to make global warming real for their takeover.

That's how they made up the Cold War,

by sending Laika to space to bite Neil Armstrong while Kubrick was faking

the moon landing. Now they're using satellite waves, contrails,

and measles vaccines as mind control and fluoridating

the water to keep people's gold fillings intact so they can be sent back to,

you guessed it, the Federal Reserve,

where all the gold and birth certificates are stored by the real puppet master,

the world monarch,

who is himself only the servant of the all

seeing eye who controls everything in the world.

I was wrong.

You do win.