Comedy Scene with Paid Escort

Well, I see you're already having a nightcap.

Or two.

Uh, Lana, this is Janet and, um...

Chrissy.

Chrissy, yes.

Well, well,

I see you girls enjoy a good challenge too, huh?

A challenge?

Well, it's an amusing story.

Don't you mean a gay one?

What?

Look, girls, um, my meter is still running, and I would appreciate

your getting your jollies on your own time.

That's only fair.

What's she talking about?

Okay, girls, I'm gonna straighten this out right now.

I have been Lana's paid escort for the past two nights.

A paid escort?

You know, a lonely woman comes into town.

She doesn't wanna go out alone, so she calls up-

You're a call boy?

Lana, this is Janet and Chrissy. They're my real roommates.

What?

And Larry's just a friend, and I'm not gay, and he's not gay,

and I'm not an

escort, and I'm going to get myself a tuna fish

sandwich.

Well, that's perfect for you. Chicken of the sea.

Now let me zip through this.

Jack's not gay, but the three of you live together.

Two different bedrooms. Oh, yes.

Well, who's the lucky girl?

Oh, no, no, no. This is a very respectable

and innocent relationship.

Oh, you're the unlucky one.

No, we're both unlucky.

Sure, sure. Listen, girls, I'm not putting down your

setup. I'd just like to get in on it.

Oh, well, I'm glad to see you're having a friendly

get-acquainted chat.

Yes, Jack, it's all been a very memorable experience,

but I think that I will call it a night.

Bye.

Bye.

Jack Tripper

a paid escort? I don't believe it.

How could you?

Well, I needed some money fast, and it's all your fault.

Our fault?

Yeah, if you hadn't have bought that expensive present,

I wouldn't have needed

money to buy you something.

What present?

The one under your bed to the cutest and craziest.

Jack, that's for the Purcells. It's their third wedding

anniversary.

No, I thought it was for our anniversary.

I sold myself for nothing.

I'm so ashamed.

Poor Jack.

Mm.

How sweet.

You did it all for us. Mm-hmm.

We're the ones that should be ashamed.

Oh, Jack, how can we ever make it up to you?

Take me. I'm already-