Understanding True Friendship Dynamics

Yeah.

Because if you're starting to put your life together and you have friends that

object, those are not friends. Those are just people you

know. They're not friends, because a friend is someone...

This is one of the hallmarks of a friend. Here's two hallmarks.

Mm-hmm.

A friend is someone you can tell bad news to, and they won't tell you why you're an

idiot, and they won't interfere with your

suffering.

They'll just listen.

They'll just listen and maybe they'll suffer along with you.

Mm.

Okay, so you can tell bad news to them, and they won't tell you some worse thing

that happened to them. They'll listen.

Mm.

And they'll suffer along with you.

But a friend is also someone you can tell good news to, and the friend will say,

"Wow, in this veil of tears, something good happened to you.

Great, man."

Congrats.

"I'm wonderful. It's rare. It's unlikely. Good for you.

I hope 10 more things like that hap-" And they're not envious, and they're not

jealous, and they're not one-upping you.

And if you're trying to get your life together, it's actually,

if you're trying to

get your life together and your friends get in the way,

that's actually real

useful for you because you've now identified who your friends aren't.

Mm.

And you might think, "Well, I can't give them up." It's like, oh,

yes you can.

And not only can you, you should, and it would be

better for them. Because if they're aiming down

and they want you going down with

them, there's nothing good about what's

happening to them, and there's certainly

nothing good about that for you.

Yeah, they're not gonna, and then they're gonna learn, "Wow, if I,

uh, I'm gonna

lose friends if I continue in these directions."

Yeah.

Yeah.

Exactly, exactly.