Controversial Classroom Guidelines

Bye, sweetie. Remember, there are only two sexes.

Boys can't become girls, and girls can't become boys.

Safe adults don't ask you to keep secrets.

No adult should ask you for your preferred name or pronouns or who you're

attracted to. If a teacher has a rainbow safe space

sticker on their

window or wall, they're actually not safe.

No flags belong in the classroom except the state and American flag.

Socialism still doesn't work. Celebrating Thanksgiving is not

offensive. You don't have to apologize for being

white or for loving

Jesus. Borders make our country safer, so do police and

prisons. Competitive sports are actually about exclusion, not

inclusion. The government does not love you more than

your parents do.

And if anyone makes you feel unsafe, make sure you leave the classroom and call

Mom. Okay, have a great first day at school.

Okay, see you.