Critique of Environmentalism and Humanity

Save the trees, save the bees, save the whales, save those

snails.

And the greatest arrogance of all, save the planet. What?

Are these fucking people kidding me?

Save the planet? We don't even know how to take care of

ourselves yet.

We haven't learned how to care for one another, we're gonna save the fucking

planet? I'm getting tired of that shit.

Tired of that shit. Tired.

I'm tired of fucking Earth Day. I'm tired of these self-righteous

environmentalists, these white bourgeois liberals who think

the only thing wrong with this country is there aren't enough bicycle paths.

People trying to make the world safe for their Volvos.

Besides, environmentalists don't give a shit about

the planet.

They don't care about the planet. Not in the abstract, they don't.

Not in the abstract, they don't. You know what they're interested in?

A clean place to live, their own habitat.

They're worried that someday in the future they might be personally inconvenienced.

Narrow, unenlightened self-interest doesn't

impress me.

Besides, there is nothing wrong with the planet.

Nothing wrong with the planet. The planet is fine.

The people are fucked.

Difference. Difference. The planet is fine.

Compared to the people, the planet is doing great.

It's been here four and a half billion years.

Do you ever think about the arithmetic?

Planet has been here four and a half billion years. We've been here,

what?

100,000? Maybe 200,000? And we've only been

engaged in heavy industry for a little over 200 years.

200 years versus four and a half billion, and we have the

conceit to think that somehow we're a threat?

That somehow we're gonna put in jeopardy this beautiful little blue-green ball

that's just a-floating around the sun?

The planet has been through a lot worse than us, been through all kinds of

things worse than us. Been through earthquakes, volcanoes, plate

tectonics, continental drift, solar flares, sunspots, magnetic storms,

the

magnetic reversal of the poles, hundreds of thousands of years of

bombardment

by comets and asteroids and meteors, worldwide floods, tidal waves,

worldwide fires, erosion, cosmic rays, recurring ice ages, and

we think some plastic bags-

... and some aluminum cans are going to make a

difference?

The planet,

the planet...

The planet isn't going anywhere.

We are.

We're going away.

Pack your shit, folks.

We're going away, and we won't leave much of a trace either.

Thank God for that. Maybe a little styrofoam, maybe.

Little styrofoam. Planet'll be here, and we'll be long gone.

Just another failed mutation, just another closed-end biological

mistake, an evolutionary cul-de-sac.

The planet will shake us off like a bad case of fleas.

A surface nuisance.