Humorous Take on Death and Afterlife

And do me a favor, be careful, on the day of my funeral,

on the day I die, if I hear one of you say,

if one of you dogs says, do not pray for him,

he's in a better spot, oh don't pray for him, he's in heaven,

I'm going to haunt you, I'm going to haunt you, till

it's your day, I am going to stand by your bed and sing

99 bottles of beer on the wall in my beautiful voice

until you give up the ghost,

oh yeah, all night, every night, twice on Sunday, till

it's your day, I'm going to sing 99 bottles of beer on the wall

and I can't sing a lick until you give up the ghost,

that's what it's going to take to get me to home.

And last but not least, I heard a great saying by a wonderful,

wonderful priest. He made the statement,

he said, do not aim for purgatory, aim for heaven,

because if you miss, you're going to fall one hell of a long way.

That was me, by the way.