Political Commentary Through Performance

Bonjour, Paris.

Hello, Washington. Shalom, Jerusalem.

This is Iran.

Remember when you told my people, "Help is on its way?"

Well, look who's on the way now. Karma!

Now, Manu, Manu, remember 2022? When Iran streets were marching, what

did you do? "Respect and admiration," that’s what you said.

A revolution, you called it, you nodded your head.

Then a boy in the crowd called you “Manu” one day.

Call me Monsieur le Président.

Okay. Okay. Now, now, now, now, half a million kids are marching your way.

And every single one of them calls you—

Manu.

Today. Seven months with no French teacher in the

French exam year.

Thirty-six in the classroom, forty degrees in here.

Leaking roofs and broken windows, that’s the school they get.

They asked for a teacher, got tear gas instead.

Anger and shame, you told the nation on TV. Insurrection,

you call it.

It was revolution for me. Fifteen percent Manu,

that’s your number now.

The kids in the street have got more fans than you somehow.

K-A-R-M-A. Karma. You cheered it on in somebody

else’s street. K-A-R-M-A. Karma.

Now the same song’s playing right under your feet.

Hey, Manu, feel the shame. Oh, hey, Donnie,

check the polls. Hey, Bibi, count the votes.

Karma’s coming, everybody knows.

Donnie, Donnie, January, you posted in caps, “Help

is on its way,” to the streets

of Tehran. Snap. Take over your institutions,

that’s what you wrote.

Now Paris is marching and you’re clearing your throat. France

is burning.

Close your borders. Oh, here we go. In Tehran, they were heroes.

In Paris, they’re foes. Same street, same signs, same tear gas clouds.

The only thing that changes is whose country’s crowd.

And back home last weekend, no kings in the ring.

No fires, no looting, no broken pane.

They just held up signs that said, “Vote early, vote now.” And

that scares you

more than a fire somehow. Th- th- thirty-three percent, the lowest you’ve

had. Gas over four for a record stretch, that’s bad.

You’re watching the streets, but you’re looking the wrong way.

Karma doesn’t riot, Donnie, karma votes election day.

K-A-R-M-A. Karma. You cheered it on in somebody

else’s street. K-A-R-M-A. Karma.

Then Donnie called Bibi. Complete and total endorsement.

Bibi will never let you down. That’s a sweet arrangement.

Bibi said, “Honored, and we’ll complete the mission.” Two men,

two elections, same

sweaty position. His vote’s in October, yours is in November.

Both of you praying the voters won’t remember.

Meanwhile, Mother of All Bombs is back on the menu.

It’s like a tiny nuclear bomb. But it’s not nuclear. Thank you.

We’re looking at pickax. We’ll knock it out fast.

No strikes till the vote.

So how long will that last? CENTCOM says, “We control the Strait, it’s ours.”

Then a ship goes down. Watch your step, superstars.

The internet swore our fishermen were catching iPhones and French perfume.

It was AI, not the sea. Even the war needed a filter. Ooh.

And Elon on X says, “An invasion in slow motion.” I can see

him flying to Paris

with his car full of commotion. Need a lift, French police?

Thrusters on, engines roar. If safety’s your number one goal,

don’t buy it.

He said before. This part’s for the people,

not the men on TV.

The kids in Marseille, the teachers, the families.

You just wanted a teacher, a roof, and a chance.

That’s not a crime in Tehran, Washington, or France.

And to every American at the pump today: Karma doesn’t burn, it doesn’t

break, it doesn’t steal. It shows up at the ballot box.

Le jour de gloire. That’s how karma’s real.

K-A-R-M-A. Karma. You cheered it on in somebody

else’s street. K-A-R-M-A. Karma.

Now the same song’s playing right under your feet.

Hey, Manu, feel the shame. Hey, hey, Donnie,

check the polls. Hey, Bibi, count the votes.

Karma’s coming, everybody knows.

Manu, Donnie, Bibi, what goes around comes around.

Another banger from Iran.