Comedic Rant on Historical Events

The f*** up Tartin Army, we've had your f***ing party.

Watch your mouth! Watch your f***ing mouth!

I, I knew this was going to happen by the way, this was the most predictable thing of

all time.

The second the Scottish left, it didn't matter who came in behind them by the way, no one

was going to replace the Scottish in Boston for the time that they were here.

No one that was a moment in time, okay?

The Avengers could've came through f***ing Boston and it wouldn't have been the same.

Right?

The fact that they're getting followed by the British, wahoo, everybody was like, yeah

it's okay, the English will be here next week, sick man, awesome, can't wait.

I'd rather listen to my parents have sex in Dolby Digital 5.1 IMAX surround sound than

listen to the British talk about anything.

Oh wait, nevermind, it gets even better.

The French might be here too, I bet the French don't even show up, they hate America.

F*** them too.

We could not have been followed by two worse places, okay?

I'd rather have f***ing Al-Qaeda and the Joseph Kony from that 2012 viral video come through

with a caravan of mercenaries instead of the British and the French, absolutely.

Get Scotland back here somehow, please.

Somehow Scotland, come save us.

We need Braveheart Part 2 to be filmed in Boston in like three days.

Miami's not even that cool, you don't want to be there, it's too hot for you guys anyways.

Come home, come home, we are again, it's like the Revolutionary War all over again, except

it's like f*** France this time.

It didn't matter anyways, they showed up with like 30 seconds left in the Revolutionary

War anyways to help us out.

F***.