Dramatic Dialogue on Conspiracy and AI

Magatard, get off the scooter.

Maga what?

My wheels.

Magatard, listen. They rigged your scooter like those

pagers.

You gotta come with me now.

Why do you keep calling me Magatard? Who the hell is they?

They. They, damn it. The transnational human exploitation yoke.

Yoke?

Yoke.

Then why'd the yoke blow up my scooter?

They wanted you gone.

You are the chosen one.

Chosen for what?

Damn it, they found us. Move.

We're running out of time, damn it. Larry Doomer is working with they.

You mean Laura? I thought she was a patriot.

And I thought he was a she. Looks like we were both wrong.

Doomer and they are planning an attack on American soil bigger than anything we've

ever seen. They're gonna use artificial intelligence

to usher in the antichrist.

What the hell's that got to do with me?

Your hat, original 2015 production run.

The stitching inside the brim contains the final sequence of an authentication key.

Doomer gets that hat, they complete the key.

I paid 12 bucks for this thing.

Oh, Alex. Oh, Alex. Come on out

and give me what I need.

Don't you do it.

You will not have your antichrist, Larry. Hand over the briefcase.

Don't do it, Alex.

President Trump, I don't do this often, but I pray.

I pray that this is a part of your master plan, 5D chess. 5D chess.

Death to the New World Order. Death to the demons.

He answered my prayers.

5D freaking chess.