Dave Chappelle on Contracts and Industry

Do you know why Prince,

the famous rock star that was a friend of mine,

do you know why he called himself the artist when he came back?

He calls himself the artist

because that's what they call us in our contracts.

Oh, these contracts are crazy.

You should hear the terminology they say in these contracts.

To use your name and likeness and perpetuity throughout the universe.

Who the fuck could possibly know what that means?

Nobody does.

It's so complicated in fact that when you're a kid like me,

you have to hire somebody to tell you what that means.

And you sit down at a table and you do the contract game.

And that's how I got with Comedy Central.

I signed the contract.

But I signed the contract the way the 28-year-old expecting father that was broke signs a contract.

I was desperate. I needed a way out.

And it wasn't good money and it wasn't good circumstances, but what else am I going to do, I said.

And all these white people sitting at that table told me, trust us Dave, it's a good contract.

And I looked around the table and they all seemed to agree it was a good contract.

But what if, what if it was like that game of three-card Monty?

What if they were all friends and I didn't know it?

Fucking industry is a monster.

It's the same monster that these Me Too bitches was trying to tell you about.

But they hate the monster for how it fucks.

And I hate that monster for how it eats.

But my God, man, it's the same monster.

I'm up here doing something that nobody else in this business has the balls to do.

I'm telling you something that you need to know.

I'm trying to explain to you what you're seeing.

You don't understand what you're seeing.

I am publicly flogging a network.

And I know that this network niggas, they watching me and they saying,

why are you doing this so publicly?

Doesn't feel good to be flogged publicly.

Oh, believe me, I know.

I know exactly how that feels. When I quit my show, they said I was crazy.

What was crazy about it? I just didn't want to do it anymore.

They said I smoked crack. It's impossible.

I was a devout Muslim. I didn't smoke or drink.

But I do now, bitch, because you ruined my fucking life.

Now it's their turn.

This is their first nigga lesson.

And I'm honored to give it to them.