Dark Origins of Ronald McDonald

This is the real Ronald McDonald, not the one you remember from commercials.

In 1892, a drifter named Ronald McDonald toured

county

fairs across the Midwest. Bright red coat, yellow waistcoat,

a painted smile so wide it cut into his cheeks.

He called his tent The Happy Meal. Admission was free for children.

Each child got a small paper box. Parents saw nothing wrong, but

children stepped out pale and silent.

By summer's end, 12 children had vanished from towns where

his tent

appeared. 20 years later, an advertising company in Chicago bought

an

old fairground poster to inspire a new

mascot for a growing restaurant chain.

They kept the name, they kept the colors, they kept the smile, and

every time you've seen it since, you've been looking at a killer's face.

Damn.

That's, that's kinda like a double meaning almost.

Why? Huh?

Because I feel like they're telling you that McDonald kills, fast

food kills.

Wait a minute. Remember my theory about fast food

and how there's not enough beef

to go around?

Yeah.

What if that story's actually true, and not only that,

in the video he was showing that he was kidnapping kids.

There's a lot of missing kids. There's a lot of missing people.

They might be using humans for fast food.

What if this is, like, the actual dark origin

that we don't know about?

I'd say you can't put it past them, 'cause at the end of the day,

McDonald's does

kill.

We could be eating human beings.

Well, didn't they say that? That that's, part of the meat has tested positive for

human?

A portion of, of a lot of fast food tests positive for

human DNA.

Let's kill it.

Only 30% of Taco Bell meat is actually beef.

What the fuck are we eating?

What's the other 70%?