Satirical Commentary on Zionism

Welcome to another episode of Zionists crying about nothing.

Episode one,

nothing happened

I had people approach me

From the Big Bang Theory to the big bullshit theory.

Mayim Bialik telling us about how difficult her life is

wearing Zionism is racism shirts in a parking lot not far from

here at my favorite vegan joint with my children.

Oh, that's horrible. Somebody walking around with some facts

written on their T-shirt. Zionism is racism. What's next?

You'll be like, "Two plus two is four."

You're trying to give free education to an American Zionist?

But that's gotta be so confusing for a Zionist.

On the one hand, they love taking free stuff.

On the other hand, it's education.

Ah, yuck

And the thought occurred to me

Oh, shit, I forgot she was still here.

Uh, so what's the horrible stuff that happened to you?

And the thought occurred to me,

"What are my kids about to witness?"

A thought occurred to you? A-

it must have been painful

Like, a, a big dude

coming, coming up to me as I'm getting into my

car. What is happening?

From what I can hear and see,

nothing is happening.

Let me recap for everybody. A guy wearing a

T-shirt walked up to you, and you had a thought

probably for the first time in your life.

That's all.

What do you say? That's terrifying.

I live in a place where people can see me walking.

Just like every place in the world.

What are you, Harry Potter?

I did not know what my children would experience.

A completely normal experience of meeting strangers?

They, they have my name in their name.

My older one is a doppelganger. I hate to say it.

It's like Mayim Bialik walking around, like, you know, a little Mayim Bialik.

For those of you just joining us, uh, Mayim Bialik's kids have her

name, and they look like her, unlike all you other losers out there

That was terrifying to me. And when I saw what started happening to

Jewish leaders,

when I still see it, I... Of course, many of us wondered, "Am I

next?"

I sympathize with you. It is a terrifying experience to

meet people and have thoughts, and it will always be

terrifying as long as you're a Zionist and you think you're better than everybody

else. Come join the rest of us in a civilized

society.

All right, guys, that was another episode of, uh,

Nothing Happened.