Analysis of 9/11 Attacks and Aftermath

On the morning of September 11th, 2001, 19 men armed with box cutters

directed by a man on dialysis in a cave fortress halfway around the world using a

satellite phone and a laptop directed the most sophisticated penetration of the

most heavily defended airspace in the world, overpowering the passengers and the

military combat trained pilots on four commercial aircraft before flying those

planes wildly off course for over an hour without being molested by a single

fighter interceptor. These 19 hijackers, devout religious fundamentalists

who like to drink alcohol, snort cocaine, and live with pink-haired strippers,

managed to knock down three buildings with two planes in New York, while in

Washington, a pilot who couldn't handle a single

engine Cessna was able to fly a

757 in an 8,000-foot descending 270-degree corkscrew turn to come

exactly level with the ground, hitting the Pentagon in the budget analyst

office

where DOD staffers were working on the mystery of the $2.3

trillion that Defense

Secretary Donald Rumsfeld had announced missing from the Pentagon's coffers in a

press conference the day before on September 10th, 2001.

Luckily, the news anchors knew who did it within

minutes.

Osama bin Laden.

The pundits knew within hours.

Osama bin Laden.

The administration knew within the day.

Terrorists who committed these acts

and those who harbor them.

And the evidence literally fell into the FBI's lap.

That a hijacker's passport was found blocks from the World Trade

Center crash site,

if you can believe that.

But for some reason, a bunch of crazy conspiracy theorists

demanded an

investigation into the greatest attack on American soil in history.

That investigation was delayed, underfunded, set up to fail, a conflict of

interest, and a coverup from start to finish.

It was based on testimony extracted through torture, the records of which were

destroyed. It failed to mention the existence of

WTC7, Able

Danger, PTech, Sibel Edmonds, OBL, and the CIA, and the drills of hijacked

aircraft being flown into buildings that were being simulated at the precise

same

time that those events were actually happening.

It was lied to by The Pentagon, the CIA, the Bush

administration, and as for Bush and Cheney, well, no one knows

what they told it because they testified in secret, off the record, not under oath,

and behind closed doors.

It didn't bother to look at who funded the attacks because that question is

ultimately of little practical significance.

Still, the 9/11 Commission did brilliantly

answering all of the questions the

public had, except most of the victims' family

members' questions, and pinned blame

on all the people responsible, although no one so much as lost their job,

determining the attacks were

Failure of imagination

because

Nobody in our government at least, and I don't think the prior government

could

envision flying airplanes into buildings.

Except the Pentagon, FEMA, NORAD, and the NRO.

The DIA destroyed 2.5 terabytes of data on Able Danger, but that's okay because it

probably wasn't important. The SEC destroyed their records on the

investigation

into the insider trading before the attacks,

but that's okay because destroying the

records of the largest investigation in SEC history is just part of routine record

keeping. NIST has classified the data that they used for their model of

WTC7's collapse, but that's okay because knowing how they

made their model of the

collapse would jeopardize public safety.

The FBI has argued that all material related to their

investigation of 9/11 should

be kept secret from the public, but that's okay because the FBI probably

has

nothing to hide. This man never existed, nor is anything he

had to say worthy of your attention, and if you say otherwise, you

are a paranoid

conspiracy theorist and deserve to be shunned by all of

humanity.

Likewise him, him, him, and her, and her, and her,

and him.

Osama bin Laden lived in a cave fortress in the hills of Afghanistan, but somehow

got away. Then he was hiding out in Tora Bora,

but somehow got away.

Then he lived in Abbottabad for years, taunting the most comprehensive

intelligence

dragnet employing the most sophisticated technology in the history of the world for

a decade, releasing video after video with complete

impunity and getting younger

and younger as he did so, before finally being found in a daring

SEAL team raid

which wasn't recorded on video, in which he didn't resist

or use his wife as a

human shield, and in which these crack special forces

operatives panicked and

killed this unarmed man, supposedly the best source of intelligence

about those

dastardly terrorists on the entire planet.

Then they dumped his body in the ocean before telling anyone about it.

Then a couple dozen of that team's members died in a helicopter

crash in

Afghanistan. This is the story of 9/11, brought to you by the media which told you

the hard truths about

His head could be seen to move violently forward.

And

They took the babies out of the incubators.

And

Mobile production facilities.

And

The rescue of Jessica Lynch.

If you have any questions about this story,

you are a batshit paranoid tinfoil dog

abusing baby hater and will be reviled by everyone.

If you love your country and or freedom, happiness, rainbows, rock and roll, puppy

dogs, apple pie, and your grandma, you will never ever express doubts about

any

part of this story to anyone,

ever.

This has been a public service announcement by the friends of the FBI,

CIA, NSA,

DIA, SEC, MSM, White House, NIST, and the 9/11 Commission.

Because ignorance is strength.