Humorous Dialogue in a Fantasy Setting

Well, world, this is it.

You know, I always thought you'd die before me.

Now as I prepare my soul for an eternity of fire and poking.

Yeah.

Less chat, more splat, pal.

Hey, Mr. S. I didn't know you bungeed.

I wanna live.

No, no, you're too heavy.

It's a glandular problem.

No!

Warlocks, sheds, mole people.

There is no escape from the Fortress of the Moles.

Oh, except that.

Ow!