Satirical Job Interview on Diversity

Hello, Nazim. Your resume is very impressive.

Oh, thank you.

You're just the type of person we're looking for as our next TMH.

Oh, TMH?

Token minority hire.

Oh, uh, what's that?

As you know, we are a predominantly white firm,

but every year we like to hire a

small number of ethnic people to show that we're an equal opportunity employer.

As a TMH, you'll be expected to walk around the

building so our clients can see

you- ... as well as appear on our brochures with

other minority employees.

So you don't actually want me to be doing any real work?

God, no. That's what the white guys are for.

Oh.

You just relax and look ethnic.

Oh, one thing, though, and I don't wanna sound rude, but, um,

is there any way you

could become a shade browner?

A shade browner?

Yeah, I was thinking a spray tan before you

start.

Uh, not too much, though. We've already got our African.

Oh, and another thing. Is there any way you could get one of

those, um, da, da, da,

da, what are they? Tur- turbans. Turbans and some robes to wear around the

office.

You know, maybe get little red dots on your head.

What are...

They're cute, aren't they?

Yeah, look, I'm Muslim. You're, you're thinking of Hindus.

Aren't that the same thing?

Look, have you even read my CV?

No.

Yeah. All right. Well, thanks anyway. Have a nice day.

Uh, starting salary is 175,000 a year plus a company car.

It's an Audi A5.

Look, what color robes did you have in mind?