Late-Term Termination Experience

I'm booked in for my termination this morning.

I feel like I am at peace with my

decision, with our decision as a family.

As privileged as I am, I didn't know how late-term

terminations work. You lay on a bed, awake,

and they have doctors and midwives in the room.

Under ultrasound, put a needle into the baby's

heart and inject it to stop it from beating,

and then you slowly feel all the movement stop from the

baby. No more kicks. Get sent home

for another 24 hours. Back up to the hospital and they

induce you vaginally give birth to a sleeping baby.

Nathan's at work at the moment. I've gotta get Betty up and

do her morning routine before taking her to school.

I'm okay, Barbie boy. It'll be okay.

I wish things were different.

Just need to let it out before I wake Betty up.

I'm not afraid of showing my emotions in front of her, but

I just want her to know that it's gonna be okay.

I lost my mum when I was

in grade six, so it's entirely different, but

death wasn't spoken about a lot and I wanna be

honest with her because she deserves it.

After the appointment to stop baby's heart, we go to a midwife

appointment to talk about what in our birth experience

and what we want done with our baby in terms of

cremations, burials, funerals. We'll get a birth certificate and

a death certificate.

Can't believe it.

Baby sister's gonna go live in the clouds today with Nanny Sandy.

Good.

Okay?

I love you.

I love you too, baby.

Muah.

Cuddle?